In The Zahir, Coelho brings up the question of freedom and what freedom means. The narrator of the novel has just been released from jail and asks "But what is freedom? I've spent a large part of my life enslaved to one thing or another, so I should know the meaning of the word." He is suggesting that those of us who have been enslaved, should understand what freedom truly is, yet he assumes that most of us are too busy or preoccupied with being busy to really understand freedom.
He continues, "While I was fighting (for freedom), I heard other people speaking in the name of freedom, and the more they defended this unique right, the more enslaved they seemed to be to their parent's wishes, to a marriage in which they had promised to stay with the other person "for the rest of their lives," to the bathroom scales, to their diet, to half-finished projects, to lovers to whom they were incapable of saying "no" or "it's over," to weekend when they were obliged to have lunch with people they didn't even like. Slaves to luxury, to the appearance of luxury, Slaves to a life they had not chose, but which they had decided to live because someone had managed to convince them that it was all for the best."
I believe I fit into the category of people that Coehlo has just described. In a very real sense, I am enslaved to the system in which I was born. I am enslaved to the rules and laws of the country and state in which I live. I am enslaved to a culture of 9-5 jobs because that's just what people do.
I am enslaved to outdated ideology on how life should be lived, that I should own a nice car, a new house, and have an ever changing wardrobe to somehow prove my self-worth.
I am enslaved to a job that I don't love. I do it for money and to live because that is what the world tells me needs to be done. I am enslaved to the status quo.
Coelho then seems to make a logical connection that happiness and freedom are invariably connected. In the book, the narrators wife (who is a reporter) makes an observation about humanity that hits on the harsh realities of how so many people live their lives.
She states, "I have everything, but I'm not happy. And I'm not the only one either; over the years, I've met and interviewed all kind of people: the rich, the poor, the powerful, and those who just make do. I've seen the same infinite bitterness in everyone's eyes, a sadness which people weren't always prepared to acknowledge, but which regardless of what they were telling me, was nevertheless there."
People equate wealth and possession with happiness, yet when people finally get the things that they always wanted, they still aren't happy.
She continues, "Some people appear to be happy, but they simply don't give the matter much thought. Others make plans...as long as they're busy dong that, they're like bulls looking for the bull fighter: they react instinctively, they blunder on, with no idea where the target is. They get their car...and they think that's the meaning of life, and they never question it. Yet, their eyes betray the sadness that even they don't know they carry in their soul."
"I don't know if everyone is unhappy. I know they're all busy."
She carries on for a good few paragraphs explaining the difference between business and happiness, and comes to this conclusion:
"When I retire, then I'll have time to do what I always wanted to do: travel."
She then questions the interviewee by asking them that they said they were happy now.
This part made me question my own lifestyle choices. Am I happy now, or am I waiting for tomorrow to chase my dreams. Will I choose to be free to follow my passions and commit myself to them? Or will I follow a secure path that everybody tells me is the right thing to do because that is how it has always been done.
But that's the real kicker. Has it always been that way, or has it just been that way for the last 2,000 years? Has humanity always had these rules, these traditions, these cultures? And if they did not always exist, then there is no reason why they need to exist tomorrow.
In the book, the wife of the narrator wants to become a war correspondent because she wants her question about happiness answered. And her reasoning behind it is this:
"I think that in time of war, men live life at the limit; after all they could die the next day. Anyone living like that must act differently."
I agree with this and it makes me wonder about my own life. If I was living in a war zone, what would I do differently in my life. What would I add to my life and what would I cut out? If I knew there was a chance I could die tomorrow, what would I want my life to look like?
I think that is a difficult question to answer without understanding the urgency that comes from the reality of the situation. But if I could ponder and look inside my soul for a moment, I would put together a list like this:
Things I would add:
- More time with family. I would cook, converse, hang out, and work with my family. Time with family is some of the happiest moments of my life.
- Adventure. There are a lot of things I want to see in this world, and in my state. I would spend time getting to know them, enjoying them, and learning to love them. Not so that I could say "I've been here, checked that off my list," but so that I could say "I understand the beauty that life has to offer."
On a different tangent, the idea of bucket lists for the sake of bucket lists is very empty and unfulfilling to me. Instead, meaning, goal, and purpose need to be behind every object on the
list. - Writing. I love to write my thoughts out - as I am doing now. But haven't done this in years. Just because I am married and have found the love of my life doesn't mean I have to stop with the hobbies and talents I had before we were married.
- Reading. I love learning from great writers. Their wisdom is something that I can incorporate in my own life.
- Nature. I love this world. From the mountains and deserts to the oceans and plains, I love the natural beauty of the world. I love animals of all shapes and sizes. I love flowers, plants, trees, and living things.
- Being open. When I feel like I am misunderstood or not understood, I tend to close of and keep thoughts to myself. I have a hard time at sharing information with people who don't see eye to eye with me. I want to open up and share my experiences and my viewpoints because that is who I truly am. I don't want to hide behind a bushel.
Things I would remove:
- Working after hours. Life is too short to waste it working at a job that provides no sense of purpose or meaning to my life.
- Cell phones. I would eliminate them completely, because they serve a purpose, but I would certainly let go of the amount of time I spent instagramming, facebooking, and redditing.
- The Utah Jazz. Again, I wouldn't eliminate it completely, but I would limit the amount of time I spent addicted to the team.
- Complaining. This is something I don't want to spend my life doing. I don't want to spend my life complaining away the days when there is so much to do in life.
- Fear. Another trait that I need to remove is the fear that I have of life. I am scared of other people, I am scared of "doing something wrong", I am scared of hurting others, I am scared of standing up for myself, I am scared of disagreeing with my wife. Being scared doesn't get you places.
It makes you realize that the idea of a comfortable, "long" life can hurt your in ways that you might not imagine. When we keep believing that we will always have tomorrow to chase our dreams, we get stuck with a bunch of unmemorable yesterdays. Don't put off for tomorrow what can be done today.
Back to the idea of freedom. Coehlo makes an interesting argument on what freedom actually is:
Freedom is not the absence of commitments, but the ability to choose - and commit myself to - what is best for me.
I appreciate this quote because I think people interpret freedom as running away from responsibility and commitment. It means leaving behind everything and living a commitment free life. And I like that Coelho argues that freedom is commitment to something we choose - instead of having somebody else choose for us.
I was also struck by this quote early on in the book:
The inspector says I'm free. I'm free now and I was free in prison, too because freedom continues to be the thing I prize most in the world. Of course, this has led me to drink wines I did not like, to do things I should not have done and which I will not do again; it has left scars on my body and on my soul, it has meant hurting certain people, although I have since asked their forgiveness, when I realized that I could do absolutely anything except force another person to follow me in my madness, in my lust for life. I don't regret the painful times; I bear my scars as if they were medals. I know that freedom has a high price, as high as that of slavery; the only difference is that you pay with pleasure and a smile, even when that smile is dimmed by tears.
The last line of this quote is especially powerful to me. Coelho juxtaposes the lifestyle of people who are enslaved to those who are free - and suggests that many of the people who claim they are free are in reality slaves to their work, to luxury,
